Not feeling particularly clever and feel on the spot during your speed date? No worries, we’ve got you covered! Here’s a list for you to check out and there’s no need to memorize anything, we’ll have copies of these printed out on the back of your dating scorecards so you’ll have a reason to have them with you throughout your speed dating experience. Pick and choose your favorites and you’ll be set! We also strongly recommend asking any particular ‘dealbreakers’ now to ease the process of finding the right person for you. Not into smokers? Can’t stand gym rats? Better to find out asap and do everyone a favour of both getting your needs met and providing the other person with the respect of not wasting their time and energy. These questions can help you find out a little more about the people you’ll be meeting, keep the conversation flowing, all while keeping it light and fun for you!
Finding out more about your date:
What makes you happy/sad/angry?
Where are you from originally?
Are you more of a city or country person?
How would your best friend describe you?
What is your dream job?
What colour best describes your personality?
What are you most passionate about?
What do you consider your best attributes?
If you have friends coming for supper what would you cook?
What's your favourite wine?
What are the most important things you're looking for in a person?
Finding out about your date's hobbies and interests:
What did you do last weekend?
What was your best weekend this year?
What kind of music do you like?
What was the last CD you bought?
What song best sums you up?
What kind of movies do you like?
What is your favourite film?
Who is your favourite actor/actress?
What is your favourite TV programme?
What do you do for fun?
Are you a night owl or an early bird?
What book are you reading at the moment?
Fun Speed Dating Questions:
What would you take with you to a desert island?
If you had to be someone else for a day, who would you be and why?
If you could invite anyone, dead or alive, to dinner, who would it be?
If you could live anywhere in the world, where would it be?
What would be your ideal holiday destination?
What's the most reckless thing you've ever done?
What makes you laugh?
If you could live anywhere in the world where would it be?
If you won the lottery how would you spend it?
What time in history would you have liked to be born in and why?
If you were to star in a movie, who would you like as your co-star?
What is the most adventurous thing you have ever done?
What would be the title of your biography?
What is your favourite takeaway meal?
If you were given $1,000 tomorrow, what would you spend it on?
Dealbreakers* (these are a few common ones, please individualize this for your own use – also great to ask these after you’ve been connected following your speed date before a first date):
Are you allergic to animals?
Do you smoke?
How 4/20 friendly are you?
Do you have/want children?
Do you like what you do for work?
What’s your biggest life lesson you’ve learned?
Have you had a serious relationship before?
Do you value exercise?
How long has it been since your last relationship?
How close to your family are you?
Are you religious/spiritual?
Are you a recovering addict?
Do you move around a lot?
Would you ever want to be married/again?
Finally, some offbeat questions to help break the ice:
If a movie was made about your life, who would you want to play you?
Do you snore?
Do you have a party trick?
Exploring or lazing on the beach?
If you could be granted three wishes, what would they be?
If you could live anywhere in the world where would it be?
What's your best joke?
What is your best chat up line?
What is the cheesiest chat up line you have heard?
DIY or call an expert?
If your friends compared you to an animal, which animal would it be?
Have you ever been told that you look like someone famous?
There are plenty of great useful speed dating questions there; just pick and choose a few for your evening. Have a few at the ready to ease the conversations along and find out more about the people you are talking to, without it being an interview, so don't be asking stuff like "Where do you see yourself in three years". This is all about fun and if it’s not, you’re doing it wrong!
*Not sure what your dealbreakers are? Not sure what answers to these questions you’re looking for? Send us an email to arrange a quick 30 or 60 min session to narrow some important stuff down and help you streamline this process. Narrowing down what you’re looking for ensures success and values all other people as you’re not wasting their time/energy (and we all know the emotional investment it takes to commit to this process) or yours!
There are millions of people looking for a partner to be with, stop wasting your time making and hoping for the connections that don’t actually meet your needs. I promise these questions do NOT scare off men/women. In fact, most find it either alluring that you have such clarity and self-awareness, or they get thrown back onto themselves to get more clarity and step up their own game to match your own. This process ensures everyone gets set up to win! This process isn’t for the faint of heart, but no risk, no reward.
I used this personally and can guarantee its efficiency compared to the previous tried methods of ‘give everyone a shot, they deserve it’. That was exhausting. Think endless 3+ hr dates (I’m a really good listener and they were so happy to simply be heard, for some of them for the first time in their lives), and all with the wrong people who didn’t share my values or what I wanted in life. I simply thought I had to give it everything I had and this was the way to do it. Instead, I ended up feeling lost, depleted, exhausted and like the whole thing may not be even worth it – after all, I had some pretty great dogs and the cat was awesome too :).
This process of clarifying your dealbreakers will save you time, heartache and simply be efficient. Conscious dating happens when you know what it is you want. If you don’t know what this is, spend a bit of time to figure it out to save you hours, days, even years (you know this to be true if you kept hoping that relationship you were in would just work out, even when it wasn’t set up for success from the beginning as shared values weren’t established).
Regardless, no need to dive into any of this on the very first night of speed dating if that doesn’t feel right for you. However, strongly would recommend figuring out those answers prior to even going out on a first date. That’s what texting is for, right J. Get to know each other prior to committing to that first date, and then you’ll be much more set up to have an amazing first date – and who doesn’t want an amazing first date!
"I am rarely stuck for something to say, but having these questions tucked away in my handbag gave me re-assurance." --Natasha
"Thanks for the tips. Had a really good night. I will never be tongue tied again." --Tom
"Brilliant night! thanks to your advice ,I got loads of funny answers! Will come again! xx." --Hayley